An hour or so before you start brewing, take your yeast pack out of the fridge and smack it. Yes, you read that right.
Heat a gallon of water to 160 degrees.
Behold! The mighty turkey fryer. Heat a couple gallons of water until it boils then dissolve the DME in it. You can then turn off the burner until the steeping grains have steeped.
This bucket will hold the wort (pre-beer) but for now it makes a great vessel in which to mix some sanitizer.
They say he carved it... From a bigger spoon!
When the water on the stove reaches 160, pour in your milled grains and let them steep for an hour. Kinda like making oatmeal. The temperature shouldn't dip below 145; if it does, add a little heat.
Preparing my hop & herb bundle in cheesecloth. See recipe for herbs. (Hint: it's also a Simon and Garfunkle song.)
To be added after the boil.
While your grains are steeping, heat another few quarts of water to 170° F.
After the steep, pour your grains and the water through a strainer into the boiling kettle with the DME, then pour the other pot of water over the grains to get out all their sugary goodness.
Don't throw out the leftover grains! They make tasty veggie burgers.
15 minutes before the end of the boil, add 1/2 tsp of Irish moss. It smells like dog but it really helps with the clarity of the beer.
After 90 mins, take the wort and drop the hop&herb bundle into it, then add the whole thing into an ice bath. We're trying to get the temperature down to a range where it won't kill the yeast.
Old sack o' hops.
When the wort has chilled to around 90° or so, pour it through a sanitized strainer into your fermentation bucket and top the bucket up with remaining bottled water to a little over 5 gallons.
Remember the pack of yeast you smacked a couple of hours ago? It should be super pudgy by now. Spritz it all over with sanitizer then cut open with sanitized scissors and pour into the wort.
Take a sample of the wort before adding the yeast with a sanitized cup and pour into a hydrometer to get the starting gravity- this lets you track fermentation and calculate your beer's ABV at the end
1.059 - nailed it
Sanitize your bucket's lid and seal the bucket. Attach an airlock with sanitizer in it. Congratulations! You have survived brew day. Go drink a beer and come back in a week for secondary fermentation.